Congratulations! You have been selected as a maid of honor (or a best man). It is an honor to hold this position. The bride and/or groom has selected you to stand by their side on their wedding day…to hold their dress or fetch red wine or to blot their tears when they cry. While there are standard duties a maid of honor should be prepared for, the one that always intimidates people is how to write a maid of honor speech.
I have been to many a wedding with less-than-great speeches. Sometimes it’s rambling, sometimes it’s inappropriate stories. If you take nothing else away from this post, remember this: You have been selected by this couple, so represent them well.
Before we begin, some pro tips.
Pro Tip #1: Look up!
My number one pet peeve is someone getting up to the mic and reading off of a piece of paper or especially reading off of their phone. I get it if you are uncomfortable with public speaking and want to have notes. I respect that. However, write bullet points down. (Notice that I did not say to put them on your phone.) Practice the speech a million times. Do whatever you have to do in order to NOT stand up in front of the crowd at the wedding staring down at a piece of paper or your phone. This will be photographed, so look up!
Pro Tip #2: Keep it short.
Keep your entire maid of honor speech to around 3 minutes. If you need more than 3 minutes, max out at 5 minutes. That may sound crazy, but 3-5 minutes is exponentially longer than you think it is. Don’t bore people! They will tune out if you ramble for too long.
Pro Tip #3: Keep it lighthearted.
Spoiler alert: It is not funny to share drunken stories or past breakups. This day is about a new beginning for the happy couple! Keep it sweet and light. Also, the day is not about you…it is about them.
How to Write a Maid of Honor Speech
Use this fool-proof formula to write the perfect maid of honor speech for your next wedding!
- Introduce yourself.
- How did you meet the bride or groom? Start with whose side you’re standing on for the wedding. You’ll connect the speech to the other person later.
- Tell a funny story about the bride/groom. Avoid anything sexual or drunken or inappropriate. Don’t bring up past relationships, family drama, or anything like that. Remember, keep it lighthearted.
- Share something sweet about the bride/groom. This is something that you love about him/her. A quality or a characteristic that you know and love well.
- Connect the speech to the other person getting married.
- Share a story about this person who is entering your loved one’s life.
- Add in a bit about the couple as a unit.
- Share your best wishes and love for their future.
That’s it! To make it easy for you, I’ve even included an example. (Note: This speech is hypothetical! Not an actual speech I have given.)
Hello, everyone! I am Caroline, Sally’s maid of honor.
I have known Sally since we were in middle school! We met in a dance class where we were the only ones who had no idea how to do “The Dougie.” That kind of moment can be a real bonding experience.
One of my favorite memories with Sally comes from when we were in college. We went to different schools, but we got together whenever we could to catch up. One holiday break, we met up at a restaurant and stayed for HOURS just laughing and sharing stories. In fact, we had multiple people comment on what a good time we were having.
That’s something that I just love about Sally. No matter how much time has passed or what life brings us, she’s always there. She is a light in anyone’s life, and I am so grateful for the friendship that we have.
When Sally started dating Bobby, I had questions. She is such a light, and I needed to make sure that Bobby was someone who would bring out that light, not stifle it.
The first time I met Bobby was on one mine and Sally’s catch-up dates. I was already a little grouchy about Bobby crashing girl time, so it’s possible I didn’t put my best foot forward. Let me tell you: Bobby was a champ. Not only did he let us catch up, but he was also such a natural fit in our friendship. It was like the three of us had been friends since middle school.
That’s what makes Sally and Bobby such a great couple. Their love is natural, like it’s an extension of the amazing people that they are. If you don’t believe me, just look around the room. We are all here today for Sally and Bobby, the love that they have, and the life they’re beginning.
Here’s to the new Mr. and Mrs. FakeCouple. May your light continue to shine and your love always grow.
I timed myself reading this fake speech, and it was under two minutes. However, it is detailed, sweet, funny, and everything you need in a maid of honor speech. Seriously, nothing more, nothing less. This is the perfect formula for how to write a maid of honor speech.
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